In case you don't want to read the article, the main point is that when people talk to little girls, they often focus on appearance instead of asking questions or commenting on what they are doing. The author suggests that this teaches girls to be a part of our culture's obession with appearance and promotes body-image issues. (It's an over-simplification, but read the article if you want a better explanation.)
And it got me thinking. I tell Sprout that she is beautiful many times a day. I also tell her that she's cute and gorgeous and any number of other compliments that relate to her appearance. Is that bad? I'm not sure. I also tell her that she's smart and I encourage her in all sorts of other ways. But is that enough?
I don't want her to be obsessed with having a perfect body or hair, but I also know that I won't be able to shield her completely from the culture in which we live and the pressure that her peers will provide. So I want her armed with the knowledge that her parents believe she is beautiful. It would be great if she didn't care at all, but I know better. There will be a point that she will wonder if she measures up. I will always find her beautiful and fabulous and I plan to tell her so. Am I contributing to the problem? Maybe, but I hope that instead, I'm giving her something more valuable. A sense of belonging, an ability to understand that beauty means different things to different people, security that no matter what messages the world throws to her, she will be safe with me.
So, I will make a point to encourage her intellectually and complement her ingenuity and curiosity and creativity. But I'll also continue to tell her that she is beautiful. Because, well, she is. And she always will be.
No comments:
Post a Comment